Settleing down with the “right” person is a desire most of us have. shortly i will be listing 5 secrets of relationships that work quickly. Excitingly we want such relationships to last, yet 53% of marriages in the U.S., 48% in Canada, 47% in the U.K., and 43% in Australia end in divorce. what can we do to make our love last? what can i do to make a great relationship?
Also it is worth noting that most relationships — even the best relationships in the world — require constant attention, understanding, nurturing, and work. If you can understand and accept the need for constant attention and work in your relationship, you’re started in the right direction. Below are seven crucial and proven factors, that will give you a long lasting relationship.
1. Availability is a key to a long lasting relationship
Relationships are about not only taking, and sharing quality time but also giving. If you find yourself not giving very much, or feeling resentful of how much you give and how little you receive back, you may be in an unequal relationship where one side is taking more than they are giving.
For instance, couples sometimes mistakenly believe that “love” will help them deal with any issue that comes up, and that if the other person truly loved you, they would just do as you ask. But people are independent with their own unique needs and personalities. Just because we found someone we want to spend our lives with doesn’t mean we give up our own identity in the process.
2. Communicate more often
communication among the parthners in a relationship is an integral part of the growth and life span of every relationship. Relationships live and die not by the sword, but by the amount of discussion. If two people can’t find a way to openly and honestly communicate their needs and feelings to one another, the relationship doesn’t stand much of a chance long-term. Couples must find a way to communicate regularly, openly, and directly. This comes just by them spending quality time with each other.
This doesn’t mean waiting for an argument to tell your significant other how much he bothers you with his throwing his clothes on the floor instead of the hamper. It means telling him when you feel the need to, and to do so in a manner that is respectful but assertive.
3. Choose Your Battles Carefully
Surprisingly After marriage or when two people move in together, couples tend to discover pretty much the same thing no matter who they are – that they are two different people and living together is harder than anyone ever told them. Love conquers a lot of things ; yes, but it is no match for living day-in and day-out with another human being (especially if you’ve spent years on your own).
Prepare yourself for this challenge by choosing what arguments you want to turn into a full blown battle. For instance, do you really want to start a fight over the toothpaste cap or how clean the shower is? Or would you rather reserve your energy for the discussions over finances, kids, and career paths (you know, the things that might really matter to a person). Too many couples fight and bicker over the dumbest things, especially when put into context of issues of true importance. just be swift to flow and match up with your new partner. comprehend and fill the gaps in each others life. this will enable you have a long lasting relationship.
4. Don’t Hide Your Needs
Sometimes when we enter into a long-term relationship, we put ourselves second, behind the other person’s needs and desires. We might give up working to have a child, or agree to move to another city to help support our significant other’s career. And that’s fine, but you need to be realistic first with yourself about whether such things really matter to you or not. If they do, you need to find a way to communicate such needs with your partner, and compromise where possible.
Two people will rarely have exactly the same wants and desires out of life — that’s just a fantasy. Instead, expect that sometimes your two paths will diverge. Express your needs at those crucial moments, but always find a way to do so respectfully and with an open mind.
5. What Type of Person Shows Up Within You in this Relationship?
Consider the friends in your life. Do different friends bring out different sides of you? Maybe you’re more reserved with one and more rambunctious with another. Perhaps you’re patient with some and quarrel with others. A friend may trigger your higher or lower tendencies.
Just as a friend can elicit a particular side of you, so does your partner. Consider the following questions: Does my better self show up when I’m with my partner? Does my worse self show up when I’m with my partner? Perhaps it’s a combination of both? If so, what situations tend to bring out a particular side of me? Fundamentally, do I like myself in this relationship?
Your honest answers to these questions offer important clues to the long-term health andhappiness of your relationship.
I believe that applying these principles to you relationship will enhance longlasting succes. they have worked for me as such they can work too for you.